Trump Once Told Howard Stern The 80’s Were His “Personal Vietnam”, He’s Lucky He Survived Without An STD

2016-02-17_15-20-38

When you remember that big haired hottie from the night before told you she spent last weekend partying with Magic Johnson

DailymailDonald Trump – who dodged the military draft – said that dating in the Eighties was his own ‘personal Vietnam’.

The Republican presidential candidate told shock jock Howard Stern that he felt ‘lucky’ not to have picked up an STD while sleeping around during the decade.

Trump added that he felt like a ‘great and very brave soldier’ when he appeared on the show in 1997, re-posted this week by Buzzfeed.

I think I’m all in on Trump for real now. Up until this point I’ve just found him incredibly entertaining. A nice change of pace in the normally insufferable election season. But this whole election’s a goddamn circus at this point (in both political parties) so you wanna get nuts? Let’s get nuts! Elect Trump and let all hell break loose. At the very least he’ll keep dropping incredible one-liners like saying sex in the 80’s was his personal Vietnam. Which he isn’t wrong about either. The Clap can sneak up on you like Charlie setting a booby trap, you find HIV in tunnels you shouldn’t be venturing down and even when you know you have to pull out you can’t do it. So cut Trump some slack here, he IS lucky to not have legs made from the same material as the space station.

So this got me thinking; what’s my personal Vietnam? I think it has to be working in cube world. Drafted in out of college all smiles thinking of the glory of making money only to find out it’s hell on earth. The smell of napalm in the morningIndian food being reheated at lunch, the agent orange work jargon that doesn’t effect you at first but slowly kills you over the years. Being left totally traumatized and soulless from the stress corporate America has put on your mind and body. Cube life is my personal Vietnam. Now somebody please either end this war or kill me so I can get out of here.

– Ballgame

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